What ever it is, it is a sign post for you. It is telling you something. It is reminding you that you are still holding some fear around it. Makes sense? Otherwise, why would you need to control it? You would just allow it to unfold,. There would be ease about it.
When we are resistant to what our reality is showing us we are resisting the message it has for us. The need to control and manipulate something is sure tell sign that it wants our attention.